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When People Go To The Airport They Magically Become Morons

March 2, 2012

Well people are already morons for the most part, but they become bumbling idiots who can’t get out of their own way. So here is a list of things that people do at the airport, and if you’re one of these people, then you’re an asshole.

  • Walking zig zag through people who are obviously walking in one specific direction. Bitch, you are not running away from an alligator. I know you’re the same damn person that starts traffic jams on the interstate. I know it’s you.
  • People who take 19 minutes to put their bag in the over head bin. What the fuck are you even doing? It either fits or it doesn’t, asshole. Sit down.
  • Putting your seat back when you sit down.  This really pisses me off. I am not short. My knees are already in the back of the chair. You putting your seat all the way back is just an extra “fuck you” to the fact that I already want to kill myself.
  • People who don’t stand up after the plane lands. There is no reason that people behind me should be frolicking down the aisle to freedom before I can even emerge from the cocoon window seat. Get out of the way, fucker.
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