Posts tagged ‘princess diana’
How To Get The Rimmel London Look
It’s the dream of every young American girl out there in the world to resemble a London supermodel, from the Black and Decker teeth to the Cigarette-stained fingernails and Tina Turner eyes. Rimmel would have you believe that they have the corner on it, but there are actually several creative ways to get the London Look, none of which involve Rimmel Cosmetics.
1. Skip sleep for 2 days. Subsist on caffeine and chains-smoking cigarettes to keep you awake.
2. Put two of your cigarettes out in your eyes. This should give you both the “hazy reds” (what we call bloodshot eyes when we are trying to make them sexy. The other street name for them is Lohans) and raccoon rings that say “I put beauty before health. I may be dying but I will make a fabulous corp……woops. I died.
3.Be born in Apalachia, so that your teeth already look like the grill on Princess Diana’s town-car (too soon?) or head to a multi-racial neighborhood and yell some racial expletives as loud as you can until someone punches one of your front teeth out.
4.Don’t eat. Ever. The reason British people have tea in the afternoon is Read more…
Remember When Prince William Was Hot?
Seriously I would care a lot more if he was still hot. I dont know what it is with Princess Diana’s sons but I feel like that family is cursed. Kind of like the Kennedy curse, but instead of dying in horrible and tragic ways the royal sons are allowed about 6-7 years of extreme attractiveness and then they descent into the depths of ugly. Prince William used to be gorgeous…but now he looks like Sarah Jessica Parker caught red handed without her horse-hair wig. Prince Harry is currently one of the hottest gingies around—but I foretell that his days are numbered. Mark my words, soon he will look like Mr. Potato head, but with so many freckles its like god threw dog shit at him through a screen door. But I suppose its better to have been attractive and lost it than to never have been attractive at all.
