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Posts tagged ‘kmart’

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For Straight Girls: The Importance Of Trying Anal Sex

June 20, 2012

This post is really meant to address all our straight female readers. Gay guys are already aware of the awesomeness of the ass. Lesbians, in their essence are assholes, and straight probably don’t read this site. If they do, they have probably had a finger or two up the old pooper. This post is for straight girls, mean to enlighten them in the joys and pleasures of the asshole.

If you have never done anal sex, you should consider it. If you don’t,  your boyfriend will probably dump you after he gets tired of your vagina. The asshole is a great secondary option for you, and something you can bring out on special occasions and holidays, like a fine Chinese export tea service. You can use your asshole to reward your boyfriend for doing super-special things, like Read more…

Is Anything Creepier Than A Baby Marsupial?

June 29, 2011

Yes. Dennis Rodman’s Dick. Chloe Sevigney’s legging collection. Lindsay Lohan’s smoke scented extensions. Beef Lo Mein. Naked photos of senators. Tripe. Asian porn. That smell that towels get when they go unwashed for a while. 2xist men’s tank tops. leather mandals. Liver spots. Toupees. Britney Spears Kmart Feet. Kmart in general. Hospitals at 2 am. Albino babies. Toenails that fall completely off. Sascha Baron Cohen’s nutsack. The gym on Fire Island. Canarsie. And Sharon Stone.

Bored And Hoard: The Must Haves From Every Duane Reade

March 17, 2011

So Ladies, your boyfriend finally proposed to you after 3 months of dating, an in order to keep up your end of the bargain you let him do anal. Now you haven’t talked in 3 days and you realized the ring he gave you was from the Jacqueline Smith Collection at Kmart. You tried to return it, but they have a no gullible bitches policy, and it was only 29.99 anyway. (as we all know a price well worth it for anal.)

You are incredibly depressed and need cheering up. What’s a girl to do?

Go to your nearest drug store (in this case Duane Reade)!! These photos were from an actual recent excursion of mine into the wilds of Manhattan Drug Stores. Read at your own risk.

 

 

 

 

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