Posts tagged ‘jovan musk’

Chuck Norris: Because I believe that his wiry ginger whiskers would exfoliate my money-maker much better than any asshole bleaching ever could. Not to mention he still owes me for the 127 hours I spent watching those horrible Walker Texas Ranger episodes. But most importantly, he deserves a Hershey Kiss for telling Haley Joel Osment that he has AIDS. If you don’t know what I am talking about, WATCH THIS.

Seriously, watch it now. And then again later when you are high.

Katy Perry and Zooey Deschanel: These two she douches don’t even get their own time-slot with my asshole since they are basically the same person. My hatred for Zooey is no secret- I simply don’t like pretty people that rely on things other than their looks to get by in life. My hatred for Katy can’t really be explained in words. I feel about her the way I feel about an obese mother letting their 200 lb kid eat a double whopper value meal with a chocolate shake, while playing their game boy, watching a mini-portable tv, and peeing in the colostomy bag she got them so they could avoid dangerous things like exercise, and don’t have to make the perilous journey to the bathroom.

Anybody that wears Jovan Musk: So basically Josh Hartnett (although he probably does so ironically) and all 7th graders everywhere.  The reason being that Read more…