Posts tagged ‘jmo’
photos via IYWIB
Bravo, the network who will give a reality show to any famewhore desperate enough to sell their souls for $500 (read: I am signing up today) has announced plans for a new show in the Real Housewives franchise called: The Real Angry Birds of Thonotosassa, Fl.
The show will center around several elite, sexy, and social angry birds as they navigate the dramatic worlds of pooping on strangers, getting hit by car windshields, and regurgitating food to their teenage children that hate them. Gloganvlog was lucky enough to be the first to attain exclusive cast info! Read more…
So I am still completely wasted and supposed to be at a birthday party for Jmo’s boyfriend Tangelo. I decide to pick up Bryce Gruber on the way. (Bryce and Timon are two of the awesome girls I was talking about earlier. But honestly—hanging out with both of them in the same day is like finding a hot uncut jewish guy–so rare its almost impossible)
So after getting lost on my way to find her and having an uncomfortable conversation with a doorman that resembled Mr. Bojangles ( who wouldnt let me up to the 15th floor of an office building at midnight) I found her at a friends apartment. This is where we found this gargantuan chandelier–or as I like to call it EVERY DREAM OF AWESOMENESS THAT I HAVE EVER HAD.
*Since Jmo Posts more than I do, I am adding him as a contributor. This will be his last post as a reader. Welcome him with open tits.
Sometimes in our lives we feel stuck… but it isn’t everyday that you actually physically get stuck. Such a state of stuckiness happened to none other than Gloganvlog founder Gary. During Gary’s birthday antics last weekend we drank an entire handle of cherry Svedka vodka, and about 6 glasses of red wine. Our blood alcohol level was enough to make Edward Cullen drunk from just one taste, so clearly shenanigans were bound to take place. And shenanigans took place indeed (this is pure gold people, you can’t write this shit)….
*My birthday dinner was a hot mess. I say this knowing full well that a birthday dinner is really a reflection of a person–so mine was disorganized, crazy, drunken, and quite an adventure. A complete shitshow. I’m actually proud. In order to save time I have just inserted the facebook message I had between Jats and I regarding the dinner,which he missed because he was day-drunk and passed out.
Okay so its no secret that I’ve been MIA because the amount of alcohol floating through my system this weekend would be enough to send the entire Osbourne family into a diabetic coma. This weekend was probably the craziest birthday weekend I have ever had. So lets talk about Friday night.
*Jmo is a twink wrangling Jew residing in Hells Kitchen. His pastimes are ignoring his mother’s phone calls, working in Advertising, and telling people they are mature for their age to get in their pants. I am pretty sure he is a genius.