Posts tagged ‘fashion’
First off, I want to say that I am not calling Kim Kardashian fat. I would never call a pregnant woman fat, mostly because I don’t need to. It is a known fact that women gain weight during pregnancy–they have to, otherwise their babies will be born glamorously thin, and then have no goals to work towards in life. I will take this opportunity, as I often do, to say this:
Originally, Keeping up with the Kardashians was komprised of 4 sisters: Kim, Khloe, Kourtney, and Killah, the out of work killer whale actress from the Free Willy movies. Killah was let go, however, after it was discovered that her and Khloe wouldn’t fit in the same big black Escalade at the same time. And by big black Escalade, I mean big black dick.
My money is on Kim. Literally. My wallet is sitting on top of her ass in this photo, you just can’t see it hidden behind all the bad fashion.
All I am going to say is that this dress reminds me of her love life.
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This is the mind-fuck of the day. I am not that surprised that Prince William looks like Prince Charming (aka, prince blind retard that would marry someone with boob-sweat just because they fit into a size 11 Jimmy Choo) because maybe he is wearing some kind of royal ceremonial outfit that Disney ripped off.
Beatrice and Eugenie have some explaining to do. I am technically hanging out with/seeing/screwing a hot British guy right now and I don’t even think he has an explanation for this. One of them is wearing a dress the color of Vanity Smurf’s misbegotten dingle-berries (that he shaved off when he realized he was a bottom) and the other is wearing a dress that is literally Read more…
I know that we here at Gloganvlog seem like we are all about the party, but fitness is a really important component to life too. Why? Because we also like to sleep around. And you can’t do that if you are ugly and fat. That is just science.
Bianca Sultana is my personal trainer. As some of you may know, she has been kicking my ass for about a month or so now and I have to say I have never been more happy with my body. Aside from training she is also a bad-ass friend and we collaborate often (and in this case for once, collaborating doesn’t mean f%cking). I actually took that above photo (if you haven’t put together that Adrian Rand is Gary ADRIAN RANDall yet, then by all means, keep drinking). I know all of you made workout resolutions that you have already forgotten about, but maybe some new workout gear will inspire you to get off your fat asses. Bianca is running a special on workout gear from the always awesome Via Prive so click to read more to get 20% off. She is also leading a team through the Master Cleanse. Video after the jump too You can also tweet her directly at @channelbianca.
Turtlenecks keep you warm in the winter, and are a fan favorite of beatniks and 90′s businessmen across the globe. Sleeveless T’s are perfect for summer time and are a fan favorite of muscle daddy’s and homosexuals across the globe. But what the f*ck is the purpose of a sleeveless turtleneck?! The designer of the first sleeveless turtleneck must of been drunk, mentally ill, or on a dare from best friends to design such a horrible piece of attire.
Sleeveless turtlenecks have no business in our society and should not be worn under any circumstance, ever. And if you choose to go against my advice and wear one anyway people will be laughing at you everywhere you go because you will look like a giant deformed uncircumcised penis. That is all.
This mannequin is giving me the “suck in your cocaine cheeks and look disinterested because you haven’t eaten in days” bitch stare and I am loving it. I also love this black shrug bolero with a hood. The awesomeness behind it is that it is neither a hoodie, nor a shrug, nor a proper bolero. I love it when creative people just mash a bunch of weird shit together to create something new. The result is like Mariah Carey- sometimes strange to look at (as all bleached gorillas are) but somehow it works pretty damn well. Its perfect for someone who gets a chill on their head and shoulders, but isn’t worried about their torso or forearms.
Ever had the embarrassing experience of standing from a prostitute on the corner, and right when you are about to ask for a beej the horrified 16-year-old notices your fly is already down, calls you “way too presumptuous” and walks away in a huff of outrage? No? Okay, well for anyone who has ever had any trouble keeping their zipper up, this style tip is for you. Enjoy the directions after the Jump. Read more…
Who said that Japan lost their cutting edge sense of innovation? While I doubt it’s coming to your local Uniqluo anytime soon, since each jacket is $140, I’m looking forward to their next hybrid… any suggestions?
Didn’t they invent the Fleshjack anyway? I know they’re working on sex robots. I hope they don’t only come in extra small.
For years the Brooklyn vs Manhattan debate has heated up. With Williamsburg and Park Slope gaining more and more notoriety over the last ten years, I often pondered the age-old question myself. Here is what I have come to learned in my 3.5 years in NYC Read more…