Posts tagged ‘easter’
Jesus chose not to hide his Easter Eggs this weekend….
Spring flings, Bible Stories, Bunny Rabbits, and Giney Waxing.
The Weather outside can only be described as absolutely amazing, or viciously cruel. Being a Florida Boy, I can’t believe that I am excited by the prospect of a 60 degree day tomorrow but it has gotten me thinking about the things we all have to do in order to get ready for Spring.
1. Stop eating everything you see, you fucking hoover. I know–during winter we can hide our fupas under cowl neck sweaters and Balenciaga mini-trenches but now it’s time to get back to the gym. (it’s been since November for me).
2. Get in touch with your religion. As you know, Easter is the day Jesus Christ bought those magic beans that allowed him to go into the tower and give Sleeping Beauty her glass slipper back. But apparently Sleeping Beauty was a bitch because she crucified him, and also defriended him on facebook. I am not sure which is worse. Spring is a season for new beginnings–so repent your winter sins and masturbate with a clean slate.
