Posts tagged ‘east village’
Birthday Shitstravaganza Pt 1
Okay so its no secret that I’ve been MIA because the amount of alcohol floating through my system this weekend would be enough to send the entire Osbourne family into a diabetic coma. This weekend was probably the craziest birthday weekend I have ever had. So lets talk about Friday night.
For the sake of journalistic integrity, I always try and take the hangover diary photo at the height of my hangover–you know when you are laying in bed wishing you would just die but you cant sleep because you have to take your morning firepiss so you finally drag yourself out of bed and realize you are wearing women’s neon American Apparel leggings that are ill fitting in the crotchal area? Yeah, you know what I’m talking about.
So faced with the choice of going to Hells Kitchen and being cruised like the 4 dollar HJ Whore that I am or spending a relaxing night at boiler room in the East Village with Jats and Keyster the decision was obvious. For once we stayed at one place the entire night.
But it was still insane.
The Hangover Diaries: Xenadrine-The Breakfast Of Champions
Let me start by saying that I’m not really hung over too bad–but I did wake up wearing metallic blue American Apparel leggings left over from a shoot I did last night. I am still wearing them. Why the fuck not, right?
Here’s the thing–I don’t have especially big balls. I would say they are a good size–In fact I am pretty happy with them overall. But sometimes in the middle of the night I can’t sleep because they are uncomfortable and I have to take off whatever underwear/leggings/pajamas I am wearing. Does this happen to anyone else with average sized balls? Read more…
The Hangover Diaries: Apparently I Dressed Up Like Marc Jacobs
You know it was a good Wednesday night when you wake up and the trash can is beside the bed.
I just got a voicemail from Logan saying he has someone elses coat. He want’s his back but isn’t sure how to get it. I have a text from another friend saying “Who is this in my bed?” I am wearing a fuschia wrap skirt from American Apparel and black leggings.
Its safe to say the night got out of hand.
Its also safe to say that I am still drunk. Read more…
Religion is like a Penis: A list of 1st Date Dont’s
With Valentines day rapidly approaching, we are probably all scrambling to find a date, or doing what I do and humping our body pillows. (That is why I have so many).
So I thought I would make a list of things you shouldn’t talk about or do on first dates. Because lets face it–a good date ends with either sex or the promise of sex. And we need all the help we can get. Read more…
PBAW (pissing/bathrooms/around/world:East Village
As a kid I was blessed to own the huge box of crayons. 144 glorious colors. So I will always know that this wall is cerulean blue, not cornflower blue, liberty blue, or frozen witchsnatch blue.
Frozen witchsnatch blue is the color of my diabetes.
