Posts tagged ‘Dancing’
Okay, I don’t really have advice on keeping your baby from becoming a stripper. Just don’t name her Amber, China, or Crystal. BOOM.
You know its not like me to get too personal, but today I am going to share something extremely personal with you. My Niece Feeny. Just like every member of the Randall Clan, Feeny was born with a certain level of awesomeness that is either going to lead to a long, awesome life full of great stories or a few shaky stints in rehab and a tell-all memoir about her life on the streets. She is the kind of kid that wants to smash glass Christmas balls in her hand, and has never met an electrical outlet that she didn’t like. Luckily, my sister is an ever vigilant Capricorn and an expert at keeping her alive. Anyway, This video showcases the little feenster’s natural born talent for attracting undue attention at urban nightclubs. Enjoy.
Frankly I am offended. The only thing she has changed is that she finally f0und a weavologist who didn’t smoke so much meth that they sent her out of the trailer park in the morning with hair they retrieved from her butter clogged storm drain.
I have seen a recent video of her so called “improved” dancing skills. And I recognize it. Its the dance I do when JMO secretly spikes my shot with a crushed up vicodin after I’ve taken a muscle relaxer to deal with the pain from laying in bed all the time writing this shit.
The only thing I will say in her favor is that she ended up with the same life she would have had if she had never became famous. She still married someone who would wear a wifebeater to a wedding, still popped out a few buck-tooth mulleted children that practically rode out of her cooch on a refurbished four wheeler with a parliament light in one hand and a nattie ice in the other.
I respect a person who stays true to their roots. But I don’t want to see it stumble around on stage in front of millions of people.