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Posts tagged ‘Dancing with the Stars’

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Lyrical Meaning Deciphered: Britney Spears “I’m A Slave For You”

June 30, 2012

Yes, I am aware that this song came out before half of the people that read this blog were old enough to S a D, but that isn’t the point. The point is that very few of Britney Spears’ songs make any lyrical sense. I know she doesn’t write them herself, and yet somehow they still come out sounding like her 3 (or whatever) year old Jaden Bocephus Spears-Federline wrote it in cocaine residue on the glass top of the coffee table (a keg with some plywood balanced on it) in their Middle America trailer mansion.

So here are the lyrics, deciphered :

 

I know I may be young, but I’ve got feelings too. (I feel like I want some cheetos, a Cheeseburger, and a Route 66 Slushie from Sonics, yall)
And I need to do what I feel like doing. (sittin on the la Z boy smoothin cream-cheese frostin in mah cellulite dimpies)
So let me go and just listen. (to the sound of mah damn kids crying. Damnit Mama’s watchin her programs!)

All you people look at me like I’m a little girl. (even though the only little thing about me now is mah weave budget)
Well did you ever think it be okay for me to step into this world. (im wearin uggs so I don’t get meth crystals stuck to mah toes)

Always saying little girl don’t step into the club. (just cause I was 13. Shooooot. I was old enough to beard for Justin Timberlake)
Well I’m just tryin’ to find out why cause dancings what I love. (and by dancin, I mean Read more…

Birthday Shitstravaganza Pt 1

April 11, 2011

Okay so its no secret that I’ve been MIA because the amount of alcohol floating through my system this weekend would be enough to send the entire Osbourne family into a diabetic coma. This weekend was probably the craziest birthday weekend I have ever had. So lets talk about Friday night.

Read more…

ManCandy Daily: Romeo

April 7, 2011

Since I’m not about to put that crazy Scientologist heffer on here, even if she hysterically fell flat on her ass (almost taking her partner with her – - he cushioned her fall), I’m staying relevant by posting the hottest guy still on DWTS:  Romeo.  When I first saw this first pic, I’m not sure he was legal but looking at the rest – - he’s all man. Read more…