Mancandy: The Hottest Guys Of The 2012 Olympics

JAKE DALTON, GYMNASTICS

He needs to jump off that horse and come ride my face.

2012 is apparently the year that The Olympics decided to bring sexy back (forgive me for that outdated reference, I am on bath salts). From the ever-popular gay App Grindr completely crashing the first night the athletes entered the Olympic village (as well as some other things, most likely) to Durex providing the London Olympics with 150,000 condoms, the ancient Olympic games have never been hotter. Will you just take a look at Jake Dalton? Just fucking look at him? He is so hot, my dick actually just inverted. Now I basically look like Serena Williams without the sweaty sports bras.

Anyway, I would be remiss if I didn’t comment on all the dick-able hotness traipsing around London right now. Enjoy!

So that’s what happens when you fist an albino…

Let’s get gymnasties!

CLEMENTE RUSSO, BOXING

And this is how you jerk off two Olympians simultaneously.

JAMES MAGNUSSEN, SWIMMING

Ugh. Beach farts are the worst.

My man-pussy burns as hot as the Olympic torch!!! No more 6 AM gang-bangs for me.

DAVID OLIVER, TRACK

Teehee. I have boob sweat. It tastes like chowder.

LANCE PARKER, FUTBOL

Blowjobs are quicker when you do them on wicker.

DAVID BOUDIA, DIVING

Oh, sweet Jesus. My anal beads are stuck in my recties again.

Do you want to see how a real bottom jumps on a dick?

Shablam! Take that, sphincter.

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